The Highest Cost
by levheichou
Summary: AU. Mulan-inspired. Mikasa pretends to be a boy to join Armin and Eren in the army. Quickly, she - or "he" - is known as the new progidy "Masaki" and also Corporal Levi is struck by the newest recruit.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: A new fanfiction and this time it's SnK! (My first one!) Thise fic is inspired by an amazing comic I saw on tumblr. I hope you like this!**

**Diclaimer: I don't own SnK! (obviously)**

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moves in, she touches your arm  
and it's too late for logic  
too late to stop it  
stand up and hurry away  
'cause you know the place where this will lead  
and it can't touch the endless need inside you  
- The Highest Cost by Son of Rust

"This is never going to work. _Never_. You don't look like a boy at all, Mikasa. At all!"  
Mikasa drew her brows together as she looked at herself in the mirror. Frankly, she really didn't fill that part yet. She had cut her hair already but her lips were still too round and her lashes too long.  
"Don't worry. I can make it work," she whispered and thought about ways to make it look more believable. "I could cut them, too. My lashes," she concluded and turned around to her brother Eren and her best friend Armin. Both of them just stared at her, expressing their distaste for her idea. It wasn't like they mattered much to her anyway. They were just lashes. If sacrificing them meant that she could stay with Eren, then she wouldn't hesitate.  
"You two should go to bed. We'll leave tomorrow morning right? I will make this work," she said again and with those last words, she opened the door and waited until both of them left.  
It wasn't that she really wanted them to leave actually. But she didn't need any audience for what she was about to do.  
Slowly, Mikasa pulled her dress over her head and let it fall to the floor. Hair, lashes and all those kinds weren't the real problem. She could always cut them. But she had one issue - two actually - she couldn't just cut off. Mikasa sighed and got the bandages she took from her adoptive father's working case. She'd have to do it this way from now on. Patched up and pressed together by strong, cotton. It would hinder her and yes it eventually would hurt.  
But it was worth it.

"Name?"  
"Masaki Ackerman."  
The man looked up from his list and eyed the recruit suspiciously. Before him stood a young boy who was unbelievable pretty. If he didn't know better, he'd think he was a girl. He had short, raven hair and equally dark eyes, framed by many dark lashes. He was rather slender but visibly fit. But his chest was flat as a board and his gaze was so hard, he couldn't believe that any girl could pull this off. So he listed down his name and let him through.

Mikasa sighed as they finally let her go on after she got observed a little too much for her liking. She tried not to let her nervousness show, however, and it worked out in the end.  
She quickly found Eren and Armin in the crowd and stood next to them, waiting for God knew what. Probably they would wait until everyone enlisted and stood accordingly so their Commander could come out and welcome them. She didn't really know. It wasn't like she has ever recruited herself for the military before.  
"I can't believe you are actually doing this. You know, you can't go back now, right? And they will kill you if they find out," Eren whispered next to her. Mikasa's expression didn't even falter for a bit under Eren's words as she whispered back: "If you keep quiet, then no one will find out."  
She could feel how Armin got even tenser as he joined their whispers: "I hope you are right… Masaki."  
And with that they stayed silent. Mikasa let her eyes roam her environment. They were outside and people kept joining the formation, chatting. It wasn't anything like she expected. She always thought of the serious and disciplined military. Not this. It was just a bunch of guys joking around. Even Armin and Eren talked to each other while Mikasa kept staring ahead.

The minutes dragged along until a suddenly everyone fell silent at once. In front of them two men appeared. One of them was a very tall and blond man with prominent features. He was obviously very important, as he stood there before them all and silenced the entire crowd.  
Next to him was a rather small man. Very small. For a man at least. He had black hair and a very bored expression without any emotions.  
Mikasa exactly knew who those two were. She wasn't stupid or unprepared. Those were Commander Erwin Smith and Corporal Levi. Their superiors.

"Welcome recruits. Welcome to the 104th Squad. I can see many eager faces. Eager to join this force and to offer their lives for humanity's sake. I will be very blunt with you. The life of a soldier is not an easy one. It's rough and merciless. In the last year we lost more than one third of our people. Most of their corpses never returned home. This year we expect even more to find their end in this fight against our shared enemy. If you cannot live up to this reality, then you should really think about joining the force. You are not a coward for turning your back now. This is your last chance. If you choose to leave then do it now."  
The Commander's voice echoed through their lines and Mikasa felt how intense the whole atmosphere was. And then it started; people started moving. They turned their backs and really left. She heard how Eren angrily gasped, probably cursing everyone for leaving, but Mikasa still didn't move at all. She didn't acknowledge those that passed her, heads down. She wondered whether she would have left if it wasn't for Eren. But then again, without him she wouldn't even be here. So there was really no sense lingering on that thought.

Eventually, it got quiet again and the Commander observed the ones that stayed despite his "warning" speech.  
"Welcome to the Training Squad, soldiers."

Mikasa put her last piece of clothing away and sat on her new bed. She shared a room with three other boys of whom two luckily were Eren and Armin. There was another one called Connie Springer but Mikasa didn't really care for him. She had to distance herself from anyone anyway. No one could find out about her gender because her life literally depended on it. Also, she couldn't leave Eren behind and she was pretty sure that he would get in trouble, too. Not that she would ever tell that he was confided in her plan. But it wouldn't get that far. It just wouldn't.

The recruits had one hour to check-in, change and then appear at the training field again. There they would prove what they could already do so they would be set in groups.  
Mikasa didn't know what she would face then. They would probably teach them to use the gears and the blades and all that. Eren was soundly excited about this and couldn't stop talking about it as they made their way to the field. Armin listened to every word he said and Mikasa would just stay quiet – like so often – until they reached the others.

They got in formation again as the Corporal appeared – this time without the Commander. Of course, the Commander had other problems than training recruits. That was the job of Heichou; Lance Corporal Levi.  
And there he stood before them; still an emotionless and rather bored expression dominating his face and Mikasa was yet again struck by how small he was. It was almost comical but she chose not to express her delight. There really was no need to draw extra attention to her.  
"Listen up, brats," Levi's voice sounded just as bored as his expression, "fun time is over for now. Get your asses over here."  
They all set in motion immediately and followed the (tiny) Corporal to the open field. Here Mikasa could see nothing but sand and occasionally a little grass that hadn't been trampled dead.  
"We will see how long and how much you can take from now on. Right now, you are pretty much nothing. We will make men out of you. So everyone: Run laps until your lungs explode. Go!"

And with that they had to start running.

Levi's eyes followed the new recruits as they passed him round after round. He could immediately see who could be useful and had potential, and who was simply embarrassing to watch. Of course, the majority fell into the second category. It was almost disgusting to see how quickly many of them fell back, heaving heavy breaths and running with sloppy movements.  
Some of them, the ones at the top, were not too bad, though. Especially one guy stood out. He was the first and passed him the most without looking very troubled at all. Of course, he was sweating and the exercise was visible even for him. Yet his movements didn't falter and he continued a steady run at high speed. Maybe there was someone who wasn't a total disappointment.

After another twenty minutes he called them to him again. He watched how some of them looked close to exhaustion and Levi instinctively wanted to step back from the sweat and smell. Just looking at them wanted to make him shower again.  
"Good, now that you are all warmed up," he announced and he could see how many faces fell because they could only have one consequence: It was not over yet, "we can move on to the real training. Drink something and then get your asses over to the gear training devices. Make groups of four and get to one of the devices." With that he walked away and didn't look back.

Clearly, supervision the new recruits wasn't one of Levi's favorite jobs. It honestly was below his standards and he could do plenty other things in his time which would contribute greater things to this world. He could work on the next mission. He could train himself. Hell, he could even dust his shelf again and maybe wash his cravats. Anything but watching children getting their ass busted. Maybe he should tell Erwin that they needed someone else for this job.  
Levi thought about other possible candidates for the job. Well, there was Mike but Levi quickly dismissed that idea. Probably because they would have dozens of complaints for sexual harassment because of his "smelly habit". Auruo talked too much for his own good, even though he was a very good soldier. He could see how Erd or Gunter filled the job expectations. But then again, he needed his team himself and they already did help him out.  
In the end it would stick with him anyway because Erwin wouldn't have it any other way and Levi was the last person to stand against their Commander.

After making a short trip inside to get a chair and something to drink, he went to the training devices. Fortunately, one advisor – Erd, speaking of the devil – was already there and he had instructed the recruits so they could start. This was actually a part of training he enjoyed. Because nothing was more fun than to watch how the newbies fell flat on their faces. At least some of them and their expressions were usually priceless.

And finally the first of them fell just after one second. Pathetic.  
Levi eyed the brown-haired kid that seemed genuinely angry about this, his eyes almost popped out. Maybe it was just his face, who knew. Next to him however was one recruit who stood straight and stable, almost not moving at all. It was the top runner. Levi could now see him from up close and he wasn't really what he expected.  
He had short raven hair and a usual feminine face. His expression was almost bored, drained of any emotions at all.  
"He's pretty good," Erd said next to him and his eyes were also focused on the same guy. Levi had to agree but said nothing. He turned his face and started to wander off to inspect the others. Let's see how long he could stay that straight and hardly move at all. Eventually, he'd have to fall like the rest of them. Like everyone.

Mikasa was surprised that her first day of training was easier than expected. Running was no real challenge for her. At home, she used to wake up early every day and she would go for a walk, sometimes even run, too. It cleared her head and eased the tension in her body. Every kind of exercise did. Physical training never has been challenging for her. So running laps for 30 minutes was no problem at all. In contrast to her companions, though. Eren didn't have such a bad time, either. He seemed a little more exhausted than her in the end, but he also was in a good condition. Armin, however, was at the very end of line and he looked like collapsing any minute. Mikasa passed him several times and considered helping him for a moment but she couldn't think of a way and further, it wouldn't be very beneficial for her or him. She was sure she wasn't supposed to help him anyway.  
So she just passed him time after time and round after round. Like all of them, actually and she didn't even try that hard.  
Just like the next training, the gear training. All it needed was enough strength and tension. She fixated one point behind all faces and tried not to move at all. It wasn't a challenge. Actually, it was rather relaxing since she didn't have to move so much. So she let her thoughts fly to all kind of places beyond the training fields and the walls of Trost. She thought of her home that was destroyed and her family that was lost. She thought of Eren and his never-ending determination to avenge their mother and to kill the Titans. The reason why they were here in the first place.

Mikasa didn't want to kill all the Titans. Of course, she also despised these creatures and she got sad and angry at the picture of her adoptive-mother getting eaten in front of their eyes. It wasn't like she didn't want to fight at all. But Mikasa wanted to fight alongside Eren. She needed to stay by his side and to protect him. Because he was reckless and he was emotional.  
But who was she to talk; she was just as bad as him. Maybe even worse.

Their first training ended soon and they were dismissed to go to dinner. So they all sat in one big hall, eating their bread and stew that wasn't exactly gourmet but Mikasa didn't really care. After she had stepped down from the device, one of the instructor had praised her for her talent. She had just nodded and went to Eren who was beyond furious. Apparently, he couldn't master the training as good as she could and was visibly troubled. Even Armin did better than him. Eren just fell on his face over and over again without any process, whatsoever. He had imagined it very differently, since he was actually one of the few that survived the Titan's attack and was so eager to fight in this war.

Mikasa looked at her stew without really wanting to eat it but she knew she needed to so she'd be fit enough. She would just eat it fast and then train with Eren because she promised him to.  
At their table some other boys sat and Eren talked virally with them. He didn't really try to include her into the conversation but it wasn't like that bothered her much. She could just feel the stare of one guy sitting right in front of her and it annoyed her. She didn't want people to stare at her. It could make them realize her gender.  
"Hey, you are that guy who did so well with the straps, right?" he finally said and Mikasa set her eyes on him. He was a tall guy with blond, messy hair. She just shrugged and stood up, excusing herself. She would just meet up with her brother later.

Mikasa left the hall and headed to her room to change. The bandages around her chest started to ache but she couldn't take them off yet. Connie being their dorm mate complicated things a lot. She was afraid to take them off for sleep because he could spot her dead give-away in the morning if she wasn't careful enough. She would take a shower now, though, and then they could get off for a while at least. It was a comforting thought.

Just when she was at her dorm, a small figure crossed her. Mikasa recognized him immediately and saluted – the Corporal.  
His eyes met hers and they didn't change their bored expression; then again, hers didn't either.  
Corporal Levi observed her for a moment, as if she reminded him of something and Mikasa wanted to just get away quickly. She just wanted a hot shower and fresh clothes.

"I think I heard of you. Erd couldn't stop talking about how good you were today. It was annoying," he said and Mikasa just looked at him without saying anything. He smirked. "Can't really believe it, seeing you in front of me now, though. You look like a weak little girl. I should worry about Erd, I suppose. His judgement, I mean," he continued and Mikasa tried really hard not to show any emotion. What was with him? Did he just stormed around and insulted others?  
_Well, you are a little girl, aren't you?_  
No, she wasn't.  
"Well, I am not as little as you, sir," she said without thinking about it. Immediately she wanted to punch herself for it. What was wrong with her? She couldn't talk to her Corporal like that!

Levi's eyes wided for a fraction before falling back into the too-cool-for-school-expression of his.  
"Excuse me?" He moved closer to her and Mikasa simultaneously took one step back. "I think I must have heard wrong. I think I just heard you begging me to let you scrub the kitchen floor with your tooth brush," he hissed and Mikasa eventually averted her eyes.  
"I'm sorry. I didn't want to disrespect you, sir. It will not happen again," she whispered and didn't dare to look up to him.  
"It better not." And with that he went on, leaving her in the hallway.  
Great first day, great first impression..


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Wow, after just one day so many nice reviews and favs and follows! I am rendered speechless, really! :D**

**I am glad you enjoy this story so much. I hope I won't disappoint you!**

**I already have the next chapter for you here (which is a little shorter than the first one) but we have some RivaMika arguing again and some Mikasa sass because my Mikasa is sassy as hell.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything at all.**

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_Tremble for yourself, my man,_  
_ You know that you have seen this all before_  
_ Tremble, little lion man,_  
_ You'll never settle any of your scores_  
_ Your grace is wasted in your face,_  
_ Your boldness stands alone among the wreck_  
- Little Lion Man by Mumford & Sons

Mikasa leaned against the cold wall of the shower. After her rather unpleasant encounter with the Corporal, she almost wanted to run away. Why did she even speak up to him? She never did that if it wasn't about Eren. Somehow she felt the need to defend herself in front of him. Maybe because she knew that she did well. Better than the most at least. Yes, she was a girl but she was not weak and most certainly not little. Still, she shouldn't have done that. But it seemed like got away with murder for now.

Right now, Mikasa just wanted to enjoy the feeling of hot water on her sore skin. Carefully her hands touched the sensitive area and to her dismay it was already damaged just after one day. But she somehow had to deal with it. Maybe it would get better after a time. Maybe she should just bind them even tighter so there could be no friction at all. No friction, no bruises. It could work. (Armin would send her a dismissive look.)

Eventually, she had to step out of the shower and abandon the comforting warmth. As she set a foot outside the cabin, she quickly put the bandages back on and slipped into her clothes. Luckily, she was alone since everyone was still eating dinner at there wasn't a real danger of an interruption. But better be save then sorry. (Especially when it was about her life.)  
She slowly walked back to the dining hall after bringing her stuff to her room so she could go and train with Eren and the gear. It was really important to him and who was she to deny him anything?

As she stepped inside the hall she could feel two eyes following her everywhere she went. They followed her when she went to Eren and Armin and when the three of them headed outside to the devices. She turned her head and met two sets of emeralds staring at her without any emotions. She just stared back before stepping outside.

Even after many tries, Eren still kept losing his balance, meeting the hard and dirty ground. She didn't really know what he did wrong. In theory, his form seemed perfect but the actual act always went wrong. As long as she held him in place with one hand, he had no problems at all. But as soon as she let him go, he would lose balance and fall.

"Eren, let's stop this or you'll seriously get hurt. I don't want you to get a concussion," she said as she held him in place once again. Eren just stared at her as if she had offered him a strip tease – a total impossibility. (Good to know.) She just sighed and stepped back one again. This time he could hold himself up for three seconds. At least that was some progress.

She shared a look with Armin and he just shrugged and pulled Eren up again. Misaka simply sighed again and wondered when he would stop. "Please Eren. You can just train again tomorrow. Your head is already hurt-" Eren snarled angrily and her and pushed her hand away.  
"Stop pestering me, okay? I know what I am doi-" His face met the ground again before he could even finish his sentence. Of course, he wouldn't listen to her. He never did.

Levi could help but stare at the odd soldier that had the audacity to speak up to him before. A total newbie to him the Corporal! He had to admit, that required some balls. But he wasn't a big fan of disrespect and so he wondered why exactly he had let him go without any punishment. Maybe he really was too startled by bravery of him. Or stupidity.  
But he still could punish him. He was his superior and he would overlook his training for the coming time. He could make his life hell if he really wanted to.  
Levi only now noticed that he must have been staring at him because before he left the room with two other recruits, their eyes met. The Corporal wasn't particularly embarrassed about that, though. He should know that he was watching him.

The next morning he had them running again. Running was good. It trained not only the physical but also mental endurance. You didn't want to fall back and be the last one. You want to stand through it. It needed discipline. Also, it was pretty simple.  
Again, after thirty minutes, he called the bunch to him and cleared his throat before speaking up.  
"You know, up to this day I really thought that running laps is something every single dipshit can do. But then you came along. Here I thought you couldn't do something wrong at running. Seems like I was mistaken..." Oh, wasn't he a really motivating Corporal? He watched their exhausted faces. Red and sweaty and all of them looked beaten down by his little speech. Everyone but one: Him again. He simply looked back at Levi with an emotionless expression, just like yesterday. It bugged him more that he dared to admit.  
"Same routine as yesterday. Water and then gear training. Go."  
With that they set in motion again while he took his time to get there. He knew that he could rely on his team. Today wouldn't be much different from yesterday anyway.

Mikasa watched as Eren's face greeted the ground again. Apparently, even yesterday's training didn't help him at all. He took a break because everyone was starting to laugh at him and every laugh made him even angrier. His disappointment in himself was very clear to everyone and he didn't need others do underline it anymore. Unfortunately they did and that was something that made Mikasa just as angry. She tried not expressing it, though. While she hung from the advice, hardly moving, she let her thoughts drift again. Already after two days this exercise bored her. Would they really be doing this again for hours?

_"… pathetic little shit, Jaeger."_

Mikasa snapped out of her daydream as she fished this little snippet. Eren was surrounded by two guys – a lot bigger than him and herself – and of course they would mock him for his failure.

She drew her brows together and her eyes narrowed a bit as they got a little too close. Quickly she got down of the device and walked up to them. Also, Eren didn't really compliment the whole situation by throwing back insults.

The guys' backs were facing Mikasa as she headed towards them and she simply pushed one of them aside – hard enough so he almost lost his balance - so she stood in front of her adoptive-brother. "Move it," she whispered and didn't even look back to him. Eren bit his lower lip and stared angrily at her. "_Don't…_", he whispered.  
"Look where you're going, moron! We weren't going to hurt your little boyfriend here. Not much, anyway." It was idiot number two. He actually made the mistake to grab Mikasa by her shoulder and tried to push her aside like she had done to his little friend. (Who just stood there, not saying anything.) Almost out of reflex, she raised her arm and grabbed the boy by his wrist, twisting it, so his whole body would turn around. She quickly kicked out and he lost his footing. Everything happened so fast that her opponent couldn't even do anything about it; he was already on the ground. Mikasa got down and pushed her knee into his back. "Do it again and I will twist your neck," she whispered so only he could hear it and a small whimper escaped his mouth, probably accidently.

"Look what we have here," another voice interrupted them. _Oh no, that was just great.  
_Mikasa raised her head and stared into the face of the Corporal. Again, they only shared a bored gaze until she let the boy below her go. He turned around on his back, moaning and pestered his probably twisted wrist._  
_Mikasa stood up straight and especially in front of Eren, whose glare she could feel on her neck but then again everyone was watching her now. _Stay low and draw no attention? Total and utter failure._

"What is going on here?" The Corporal stepped further up to them, standing over her "victim" who now realized in front of whom he was laying. He quickly stood up, blushing. Mikasa almost smirked; talk about being a little girl.  
"Nothing, sir. We were cuddling." She couldn't stop the words from escaping her mouth. Why was she always saying stuff like this to him? Why couldn't she have just shut up after the 'sir'?  
Her little friend, turned around, obviously enraged and raised his unarmed hand to point at her.  
"He-he attacked me and threatened me like some… some… hooligan!"  
Mikasa just gave him an unimpressed look and wondered what he would do if he knew she was a girl. Cry? This time, she remained silent for once. Behind her, Eren was breathing audibly and she dared to look back to him, trying to tell him to shut up now. She knew he was going to say something any minute and she couldn't have that.

"What's your name, brat?"  
Mikasa looked back to the Corporal and was surprised to find out that he wasn't talking to her. He was addressing the other guy.  
"Mueller, sir," he replied, even tenser now. The Corporal started walking around them, arms behind his back and eyes not leaving Mueller.  
"Well, let's see, Mueller. You actually got pinned down by someone who is half your size. You must be proud." Mueller stared at the Corporal since he hadn't expected that reaction. He didn't say something, though. He wasn't as stupid as Mikasa who could not shut up in front of the Corporal. He just averted his gaze and stared at the ground, obviously very angry. Probably with Mikasa and not Levi. Speaking of, said person also turned to Mikasa now, standing right in front of her. He had to look up but his eyes and stature were still intimidating nevertheless. She had to admit that and wondered how he did it.

She couldn't really say why she was so bold and almost impudent to him. She only talked to him twice and at both times a unnecessary comment had slipped her. She never was like this. Usually, she didn't even take the effort to retort to anything when it was solely about herself. She would always defend Eren or Armin but herself? She would just ignore and shrug it off. But he just got the worst out of her. It was terribly irritating.  
"And you again…," he hissed and his eyes narrowed for a fraction. "Ackerman," she replied, staring back at him. Behind her Eren snarled but everyone seemed to ignore him.  
"You know, _Ackerman_," he put as much venom as he could into her name; "you seem to be an extraordinary shitty brat. Here we are, training for war and you start beating up your fellow losers. Do you think we have time for shenanigans like this?" He paused as if he waited for an answer. "I sense that that is a rhetorical question." _Shut up, Mikasa!_ "You're going to wash the showers for the rest of the week, every evening during dinner time."  
_What's with him and washing chores,_ Mikasa wondered but said nothing – since she already had said enough - and just stared back at him.

"Sir, please! He grabbed his shoulder first."  
Mikasa turned around to Eren who eventually couldn't shut up anymore. She gave him a warning look but apparently he wasn't having any of it. "He provoked Masaki."  
The Corporal didn't move his head; only his gaze and looked at Eren as if he was the most uninteresting thing he had seen in his entire life.  
"And I care because?" he replied and set into motion into the other direction. He only turned his head to look at Mikasa again, staring at her like he had done yesterday in the dining hall. "You can pick up the cleaning utensils before dinner at my office." And with that he left them behind.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Hey guys!

First, thank you so so much for the follows/faves and most importantly the reviews! I am so glad you like this fic and I am SO sorry that it took me so long to update. I am a horrible person.

I was on vacation in Mexico and I had hoped to get some good work done there but somehow it didn't really work. (But it was a great vacation, nevertheless.) So now here it is - finally!  
I hope you like this chapter and I would love to hear your opinion about it in the reviews!

It's also a little fillerish and there isn't much sassy Mikasa in there, unfortunately... But she will be back in the next chapter!

Reminder: English isn't my first language so sorry for any stupid mistakes.

Diclaimer: I don't own SnK and the whole Mulan-deal is also not really mine, so...

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_Standing on the cliff face_  
_Highest foe you'll ever grace_  
_It scares me half to death_  
_Look out to the future_  
_But it tells you nothing_  
_So take another breath_  
- Icarus by Bastille

"This will be everything you need. Do you job right, I will check."  
Mikasa tried to swallow down a sigh as she took all the stuff – and it was really a lot – the Corporal gave her for her newest duty. It wasn't that she minded it that much. She really could understand why she had to do it. It was still very annoying but she certainly wouldn't complain about it because she had a new goal: Don't piss off the superiors.

Words of her "bravery" (or stupidity) quickly spread and when she sat at lunch with Armin and Eren, many people were gathering around them. It wasn't just that she had spoken up to the Corporal but also her results in the training which were very good. Also, Eren really didn't help to ease it off. He started talking about his ambition to _"Kill all those damn Titans"_ and he talked about how they had survived the huge attack years ago. Of course people started gathering around them and Mikasa was visibly annoyed. She just stood up and decided to run some laps outside. Running was good. Running helped her to relax every time.

"You… you are Masaki right?"  
Mikasa stopped and turned to a familiar guy. He was quite taller than her, with blonde hair, though it was different from Armin's goldish hair. His was darker and somehow… like mud actually. He had been sitting in front of her yesterday, she remembered vaguely. He had stared at her while she ate.  
Mikasa nodded. A grin spread across his face and he grabbed her hand and shook it.  
"You were really cool earlier today. Those idiots had it coming… You are sharing a room with Connie, aren't you?" Mikasa nodded again. She really didn't know why he was talking to her and he seemed to be done, so she started to go. "I'm Jean, by the way!" She just nodded again but didn't stop and only left the room. It really was too crowdy in there anyway and Eren wouldn't be in danger in there – or so she had thought.

After a few laps and the theory lessons they had in the afternoon, she found him in the main hall again – unfortunately he was fighting with yet another guy. Mikasa quickly ran up to them and stood between them. "Eren, what are you doing?" she asked and completely ignored the other guy. She didn't even look his way. "Mi- Masaki, get out of my way! I need to punch an idiot." A dark chuckle made her finally turn around and she recognized the guy from earlier, who had talked to her. Jean. "What is it, Eren? Scared?" Jean stepped closer, though he didn't ignore Mikasa entirely. "Sorry Masaki, but your brother is a fucking moron."  
Her eyes narrowed for he bit and she turned around to him, covering Eren. "Jean, step back," she said with an absolute voice. Mikasa hoped that he'd listen to her because she really didn't want to start a fight again. The last one was just a few hours ago and she didn't want to spend most of her day cleaning because she knew that would be exactly what the Corporal would make her do.  
Fortunately, he really did. He just gave Eren another angry glare but left.  
Mikasa decided not to say anything. For one because she had to leave in a bit to meet with the Corporal for her newest duty and for second she knew that if she would start telling Eren to be more careful, he would get even angrier and start a fight. Because of reason one she didn't have the time for it. So she just exchanged a long look with him before taking her leave.

And here she was now. The Corporal dismissed her with a wave of his right hand without even looking at her – talk about being rude – and she just left to start cleaning the showers. What a great day.

When she came to the Jaegers after her parents died, she often helped Carla with the chores and also back at home she would help out her mother while her father was out to hunt. Sometimes though, on special days, her father would take her with her and show her how he did it. She killed her first rabbit with eleven and her first deer with twelve. Weapons, death and slicing weren't foreign to her. Though, she never realized that death was constantly surrounding her. Not until she watched how those men came barging in, killing both her parents before her eyes. She had been fifteen at that time. Even though Mikasa could take down a deer or even a mountain lion, she couldn't move to defend herself back then. She just stared at the body of her parents, bloody and unmoving and she let those men take her with them. They wanted to sell her, she gathered, because of her foreign looks. They were watching her like that, with these disgusting eyes and she had feared that they would soon touch her, too. But then there came Eren and he saved her life. He really saved her. Not just by freeing her but also by giving her energy again and a reason to live.  
Cleaning reminded her live with the Jaegers and fighting and training of her home.

Levi decided after one hour that the brat would be done and he went to check. Due to that damn paperwork he missed dinner and just grabbed two apples from the kitchen.  
When he stepped into the shower area he was surprised. Masaki was still on his knees, scrubbing the floor but he seemed to be almost ready and he didn't do a half bad job. The recruit hadn't noticed Levi yet and he used the opportunity to eye him again. Especially now he didn't look like a guy at all. At least not his face. One could clearly see that Masaki was in a good condition. Beneath the white shirt, the outlines of muscles could be seen which wasn't so usually for a newbie. When you are a soldier for a time, muscles aren't something special but many came here without any. This is why so many sucked. But right now, Masaki's face looked a lot like a girl's one. He had unusual long lashes and very soft features. Also, the way he brushed his hair out of his face while working was rather… wait… was he checking him out? _No_, he wasn't. He was simply _observing_ him. While he was working. He looked like a girl and that was a reason to laugh, wasn't it? It was funny. Right.

"I expected worse, to be honest."  
Masaki didn't shriek or seemed to be surprised. Has he already noticed Levi? He just stopped scrubbing and slowly turned his head. "Heichou," he said with a dry voice and then returned to his work_. Huh, who would have thought? _The Corporal almost expected that Masaki wouldn't do his job right. He seemed to be a rebellious type but when he thought about it he noticed that he always did his work right. He was a brat, impudent and a pain in the ass but also in training, he always did what he was told.  
Levi was about to step closer to observe his work when the soldier stopped scrubbing yet again, extracting his arm to stop him. "Don't. I just scrubbed the floor and you will make it dirty again."  
His eyebrows shot up as he looked at him at surprise. Was this guy trying to tell him something about hygiene? He knew very well what his shoes would do to the clean floor but he expected him to just clean it again after he left. He didn't care whether he would make it dirty again, as long as Masaki would just clean it afterwards.  
Levi couldn't believe his next step, but he really took off his shoes. That damn brat made him take them off. Masaki just kept looking at him, drained from any emotions just like Levi himself. And while he pulled off the long boots, they kept looking at each other without saying a word.

Now barefooted, he walked around the showers and silently admitted they were really clean. He looked back to Masaki, who kept scrubbing and ignored him completely and he didn't know why it bothered him so much. He was used to have all those kids lining up before him, staring in awe. He was used to utter respect and sometimes even fear. He kept thinking that he didn't care what others thought of him and most of the time it really was true – since most people didn't like him at all – but somehow the lack of respect of Masaki bugged him immensely. It was irritating.  
He didn't like it one bit and in that moment he decided that he didn't like Masaki just as much.

The Corporal stood there for a while, eating one apple and then left without saying anything else. He put on his shoes and didn't look back to Masaki, who in return looked after him as he stormed off.

Mikasa spent some thoughts on the odd Corporal. How he had observed her - and she had been so sure he would just make another stupid and rude comment – and then just left without saying anything. What was his deal?  
She had been really surprised, though, when he took off his shoes after her warning. She would have expected him to go outside, run a little in wet mud and come back, spreading it everywhere just to piss her off. But he didn't and honestly she was very grateful for it.  
She finally stored all the cleaning supplied in a cupboard right in the shower area (so she wouldn't have to go to the Corporal everyday) and sat down on one of the wooded benches. Her back and knees hurt from scrubbing the floor and her hands were visibly affected by all the liquids she was in touch with. Cleaning a small home and cleaning a big shower area was different after all.  
Mikasa's gaze met one of the showers and without thinking, she got rid of her clothes and stepped under it – not caring whether it would make that spot unclean again. She needed this now and – most importantly – she needed to get those bandages around her chest off.

After the shower, she locked the door and looked at her naked self in the mirror. Apparently, binding the strong cotton even tighter around her chest didn't benefit the situation at all. There were clear marks were the edges of the bandages laid and some spot were even bloody. And they hurt – a lot.  
Her fingertips traced the little marks and she wondered whether they would leave scars. Not that it mattered anyway.  
Mikasa didn't care about her appearance. She never had. This is why she didn't care about her hair being so short now and why she even was ready to cut off her lashes.  
She didn't consider herself as feminine anyway. All the running and the workout she had practiced before, had took away anything ladylike – at least that was what she thought. Her skin was rough and muscles were starting to show. They would get more now with this effective and oriented training here.  
Back when she lived with Eren, the others were afraid of her anyway. They would call her scary and odd. The girls wouldn't see her as such because she was so different from them. But it never really mattered to her. As long as he had Eren and Armin, then everything was okay for her.

When Mikasa put on her clothes – and the painful bandages – again, she decided to just go to her room. Dinner was over and she was just tired from this eventful day. As she was about to leave the shower area, she spotted a little apple sitting there on the counter next to the exit and she wondered where it came from. It couldn't have been… from the Corporal? No, that wasn't possible.  
She picked it up and observed and it seemed fine enough so she took it with her and ate it on her way to her room.

On the next day the mystery behind Eren's constant failure with the training gear was revealed. It came out that it hasn't been his fault. The gear he had been practicing with had been rusted. Right after he got a new one, he mastered it just perfectly. Mikasa gave him a little smile as he watched him having total control over it now.  
They said that, now everyone had mastered it on these practice devices, they would get the real deal. So they received their first 3D maneuver gears. They also were just for practice and they were obviously used many times but Mikasa couldn't help but like the feeling of it.  
When they lined up at the edge of the forest, the Corporal picked her as the first one to try it.  
They had had theoretical lessons on it before and Mikasa remembered everything perfectly. So the turned her hips in the direction she wanted to go, one hand to the gear and another one up for balance and there she went.  
It was an indescribable feeling. At first she was taken aback by the speed and the first push caused by the gas. But already after the second turn she got the hang of it and fixated a tree behind her and spun in mid-air, getting even faster. She was supposed to reach the end of the marked area in two minutes. Her eyes narrowed, she could do it in less than one.  
Mikasa didn't even know why she wanted to beat the time. It wasn't that she wanted to impress the others or that she wanted to be the best. No, she just realized that this was something she really could do. For once, this was for herself and she almost never did anything just for her own sake.

So without hesitating one moment she turned up the gas and flew forward, maneuvering through all the trees, making spins and even some backflips. Not for aesthetic reasons but because she could fixate the best possible spots in these positions and also get to her maximum speed.  
Everything around her was just a blur as her feet finally came in touch with the last tree that was marked at the finish. She collided hard with the wood, not faltering for a bit, but steadily holding herself up. Her body was pumped with adrenaline and she realized that she actually enjoyed this more that she expected.

Further up on the tree, adviser Erd and Aurou were standing, staring at her in total amazement.  
"Ackerman… You only took 43 seconds…," Erd said to her, as she heaved herself up to them. She just nodded and said nothing and both of them just kept staring. "T-that was amazing!" Auruo added and again she just nodded. Apparently, they expected her to break out in a victory dance but all that Mikasa cared about was that she would be allowed to go back to the crowd on the same way – flying.  
"Should I go back?" she asked and after some hesitation they both nodded. She was just about to fasten her gear again she Erd tapped her shoulder.  
"No, the Corporal wants all of you to run back." Mikasa's eyes widened for just a moment but she quickly composed herself. She didn't reply to them, as she maneuvered herself to the ground and after throwing herself solely in the air, it was almost weird to walk, knowing you could be so much faster.  
On this day, in that very moment, Mikasa really realized that she was good. She was a good soldier.  
And she was a girl.


End file.
